Kiki's Personal Blog

Don't be Afraid to Eat Alone


04 Mar, 2016

Are you afraid to eat alone?

Well I use to be afraid.

It's funny how life shows us things or signs and we choose to ignore them. Until that day when something happens and we are forced to acknowledge what we have struggled to understand or just simple ashamed or scared of what other's may say. I realized just a week ago how worrying about what they say  or looking for acceptance is not happiness. You see no person or family is perfect. I thought my family hated me for years due to chooses I had to make at the age of twenty-one over eighteen years ago after the death on my mother. It took the death of my father a week ago for me to realize what I had been told by some many years ago that my family loves me and wanted to be apart of my life was true. To sum up along story I found what I thought was love at the time with the wrong man despite my father's warnings over the years. I guess since my relationship with my father was a rocky one after the death of mom I felt how could the kettle call the kettle black after I saw him put my mother through things she did not deserve. At the end day I found myself dealing with the same circumstances I so dearly hated my father for like cheating, lies, and coming in all hours of the morning. I acknowledge and admitted to myself a week ago I don't serve to be cheated on, called out of my name, and belittled by any man. Why? What I bring to the table is far more than what he deserves. I am educated, employed God fearing mother, sister, aunt, niece, and friend. Far more than he deserves. I guess it's never to late to find and acknowledge yourself worth. I guess what I am trying to say is families go through things but at the end of the day, no matter what your family is still your family they can help you get through things that you think may be the end of your being like a bad relationship. Know your worth.  

I leave you with these words:

I know what I bring to the table.

So trust me when I say I'm not afraid to eat alone anymore.